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Monday, June 27, 2011

Why do I find such shitty ass friends?

I've lost a number of friends in my life due to drama. I fucking hate drama. There's nothing I hate more than bullshit girl drama.

There's this guy that started at my work...wait, wait, maybe I should start with my new "friend". She lives in the building across from mine. Our patio's face each other so we spent last summer just waving at each other as we both lounged on our patios, drinking beer, reading our books. Eventually she invited me over for a beer, and well, we hit it off. She was a lot of fun to be around and had NO drama. I mean she had a little drama but never dwelled on it and it never seem to affect how she lived her day to day life.

One day I text her as I ran into the new guy at work. He was so damn cute and totally my style. I ended up chatting with him a bit, we had our first aid class together the following week and I was looking forward to hanging out with him. We hit it off almost immediately during our course and by the time I had gotten home that first night, he had added me to FB. Excited, I logged on and saw we had 3 mutual friends. Two were work friends (which made sense) and one was my friend from the other building. I text her as soon as I saw that. Something like, "woah! small world, you know the new guy at work?! weird!" After a long silence, I got a message back from her. "Stay the fuck away from him. He is mine. I will not say it again, stay the fuck away from him." Ummmm, excuse me?!

First of all, I am respectful of my friends and expect the same sort of respect back. What she said to me was beyond a level of disrespect that I will stand for. I called her out on it. I could care less about the guy, I mean had she said to me "Amanda, I have a history with him and it would hurt me if you pursued it." I would have been fine. But no one has a right to say what she said to me. I do not put up with bullshit drama.I called her out on it and she chose not to respond. I mean the guy isn't worth talking about anymore but I am still a little bent out of shape about the whole thing. We spent a good two months awkwardly avoiding each other in the parking lot and around the neighborhood and one day she finally called me and asked to talk. Really she just wanted some books that I had back and that was fine. She never said one word about what she said to me or how she reacted to the whole situation. But I thought, to make my life here a little less awkward and annoying, I'll just smile and be nice. So she starts calling and texting again and I start smiling nicely and not avoiding her so much anymore.

Regardless of how I pretend to be her friend, she is still a shitty person in my books. I want to clarify that it has nothing to do with the guy. I get people have history and I get that it would be hard for a friend to go out with someone you used to have a history with - I respect that. It has everything to do with what she said and the fact that she refuses, to this day, to apologize for being a bitch.

The truth is, I still avoid her and she's catching on. She whines when I go out with my other friends. She whines when I don't text her back right away, she has become the epitome of the kind of friend I hate. She is clingy and annoying. I wish I could just cut ties but it was so awkward whenever I would run into her. I seriously hope she moves soon.

I think I'm a good friend. I take care of my friends. My friends mean everything to me and I will do whatever I have to do to be there for them but I won't for her. It is a superficial relationship and that is it.