I'm feeling very unsettled as of late. Like my head is in one place but my physical self is in another I can not, for the life of me, concentrate on any of the necessary things that need to be dealt with. It took me a whopping 6 hours to clean my house yesterday. 6 fucking hours! It was a simple tidy, vacuum kinda clean, shoulda been an hour max. But I'd find myself just sitting down, staring at that piece of lint on the floor thinking "I wonder if my crappy ass vacuum will pick that up...I wonder what my mom is doing...I wonder what G is doing...Why does it smell like oranges over here" and so on. I feel like I've been overcome with a temporary case of insanity or perhaps just ADD.
My mind refuses to wrap itself around anything right now. Even if I do start thinking about important things (such as my looming midterm!) I can only concentrate on it for a few minutes before something distracts me.
I feel like the constant distractions might be my attempt at not feeling depressed. I've never really felt "lost" before but right now I do. I have to say, my friends, this is not a pleasant feeling. I feel as though I'm just wandering through my days with little, or no acknowledgment to what is going on around me. It's a truly terrible feeling.
Hrmmmmm I don't know what to do with myself.
Monday, February 23, 2009
I once was lost, but now am found...or not
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1 comments:
i completely feel you. i feel like this all the time (worst of all at work). i do think its an attempt not to feel down sometimes. but the best thing to do is to not over analyze it, just go through it.
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